I want to feel my weight. Being numb to it isn’t helping to reduce it. When factoring in the time and effort it takes to wake up to it and stay awake, it isn’t worth whatever short-term benefit the ‘numb to it’ provided.
So each day for a while, in my mind, I will weigh less than the day before. In my mind, not on the scale. Use the mirrors, suck in the gut and lock in the concept of not feeling any worse tomorrow than you feel today, because your weight will not increase in your mind. You will make sure that it doesn’t by what and how much and how often you eat.
Do it for about a week – instead of watching your weight on the scale, feel your weight. All of it. Feel that which you are, knowing that each day will not be any worse – weight-wise – than the day before.
How does it feel, using all your senses – the ones science has yet to identify? It’s not helping you that the people and institutions controlling the science are so resistant and slow. You know you have more senses than the government says you have. Screw ’em. They may control the science, but they don’t control your senses – though they try mighty hard. You control how you feel and what you feel.
Feel your weight in absence of shame. There is no shame in waking up.