I lost a pound today. Well, I was one pound lighter when I weighed myself this morning than I was yesterday morning.
This is the time to be careful. There’s something in my brain that happens when I lose one pound. For some strange reason I think, now I can eat, and for another strange reason I throw caution to the wind.
The wind doesn’t want me to throw my caution at it. It wants me to be cautious. It’s my day off today, which means usually I like to eat out. Big portions are not my friend after I’ve lost one pound. And why pay for something I’m not going to finish eating? Well Of course I’ll finish it, at some point during the day, after I wrap the leftovers to go.
Today is a tipping point. I can make it or break it. I’ve cut myself too much slack – and there’s always a reason to ease up on demands I place on myself because who’s looking anyway?
Self-respect has nothing to do with it. Disappointment does. Is the taste of that food and the good time I might or might not have if I go out to eat worth the disappointment I will feel when I get on the scale tomorrow morning? I don’t like that feeling. That bad feeling lasts a lot longer than the enjoyment of a mediocre meal.
Let’s face it, eating out animal-free isn’t exactly haute cuisine and it rarely reaches fine dining status. I can’t afford fine dining eating out anyway – not today. So let’s go further – how about diner status? Nobody has diner-style animal-free. So it’s not for the food I go out.
I mainly go out to socialize, since I’m tied to the computer and maintaining my living space throughout the week. But socializing involves drinking and drinking for me has to involve eating. I can’t drink and not eat like so many other people evidently can.
So there’s my dilemma: to go out or not to go out. Even if I don’t go out today, I’ll have the same dilemma next week, on my next day off.
P.S. It’s tomorrow today. I didn’t go out to eat. Binged on Netflix but didn’t overeat. This morning I weighed one pound less than yesterday. I’m optimistic. This morning at 7 AM I made a fat-free spaghetti sauce with veggies for today. Yesterday we had veggie burgers – mine.